I'm Magic!

Yes... I stopped taking my meds. So I went high for two days. Magic. I know that I have the power to effect change in the world through force of will. But I will end up doing black magic, because I'm an evil person. I wished my own Daddy was dead today because he annoyed me. He was shouting. I tried to give him a heart attack. I wish I was dead. And I think I have something wrong with my heart (I am a bit hypochondriacal). I get pains in my chest now and am tired all the time. Then again, it could just be Clonazepam and exercise aches. I hope it's my heart and I'll have a heart attack and die. That would be only fair. I'm not high anymore. I didn't get dressed today even. I'm TIRED. Does nobody understand that? They all dragged me out of bed, the bastards. Threats, shouting, violence. Like they care whether I'm awake or not. They only want me to get back to normal. They think I'm all OK because I'm not thin any more. They found out I was throwing up again though, so now they stalk me. I leave the table, and they yell after me "Where are you going?" "Don't go to the bathroom!" It really really makes me want to puke my guts up. But I can't because they're spying on me all the time. I want to leave home.